Snow!

So we have a bit of snow in P-Town today. Keep in mind that even though it may not look like much, these are taken in parts of Paradise with very low elevation. Some were even south of Paradise.

I mean snow in my yard? That doesn't happen.

Fur Thoze uf us hoo wnet to paradyze hi skuul

We should all feel intelligent now.





ht to ysmarko

Sometimes I Learn

What I have learned is that sometimes... it is better to stay quiet. Others have said things far better than you. Sometimes all you need to do is listen to what those who have come before you have said and try to become their dreams.

Here is what I have learned.

"Preach the Gospel at all times using words when necessary" “Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; and where there is sadness, joy.” “While you are proclaiming peace with your lips, be careful to have it even more fully in your heart.” -St. Francis of Assisi “Peace if possible, truth at all costs.” “Beautiful music is the art of the prophets that can calm the agitations of the soul; it is one of the most magnificent and delightful presents God has given us” - Martin Luther “When you see a man with a great deal of religion displayed in his shop window, you may depend upon it, he keeps a very small stock of it within” “The anvil is not afraid of the hammer.” “Humility is to make a right estimate of one's self.” - Charles H. Spurgeon “Thou hast created us for Thyself, and our heart is not quiet until it rests in Thee.” -Saint Augustine “Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.” “Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend.” “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” “The first question which the priest and the Levite asked was: "If I stop to help this man, what will happen to me?" But... the good Samaritan reversed the question: "If I do not stop to help this man, what will happen to him?"” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

Something Wonderful

I have a wonderful friend, a wonderful gift and a wonderful wife. Her name is Mandy and she has a blog.

Here.

I'm proud of her. A Facebook and a blog in the same week.

Some Thoughts

A power nap is when you sleep on someone who's weaker than you...

I went whale watching once... It was very similar to watching people on a boat become disappointed... we did a lot of whale-thinking-about that day...

a mobile home with a flat tire is a home...

if you can't tell the difference between a spoon and a ladle, then you're fat...

I want to put stickers on turtles, I don't know why. I just know that's the best kind of animal for advertising your band in nature...

I have a time-machine. It only goes forward at regular speed. It's essentially a cardboard box that I wrote "time machine" on in Sharpie...

How fast does a zebra have to go before it looks gray?

I've met many chocoholics but I've never seen any Chocohol. We've got an epidemic - people that don't understand the rules of word endings... they're probably over-workahol-d...

They call it fishing... but they should call it what it really is: "tricking and killing"...

Hiking is just walking where it's ok to pee...
(sometimes old people hike by mistake)

I want to commit a crime during a re-enactment. Turn it into an enactment...

"Hot Potato" is a very different game when the people playing are starving. Then it's more like "My Potato." Burned fingertips and I don't care... free potato!

I used to get upset when it rained... then I realized it's God's way of washing off hippies.

I think they should put pies on the front of trains, that way when they hit something at least it's a bit funny.
"He's dead sergeant, but there's a cream pie right in his face"

I love birthdays... You get a cake for every year that you're alive. When I see a new baby I'm like "Yes! Please survive. I like chocolate!"

Cakes are the only food we write on. It's always so encouraging.
"Happy Birthday Leo, Congratulations Dennis"
I feel like we're missing an opportunity - I'm talking about negative cakes.
"Surprise! You're adopted"
Cause that's when you want cake.

Game, set, match = Tennis
Set, match, run = Arson

I like video games but they're very violent. I want to design a video game in which you take care of all the people who've been shot in all the other games.
"Hey man what are you playing?"
"Super-Busy Hospital" "Please leave me alone. I'm performing surgery on a man who was shot in the head 57 times."

If somebody asks you the question "are you ticklish?" it doesn't mater whether you say yes or no, they’re going to touch you.
If they say "are you ticklish" and you don't want to be touched you have to say something like. "I have diarrhea, and yes, I'm very ticklish"

If I ever saw an amputee being hanged... I would just yell out letters...




(Thanks Demetri)