Sunday, October 16, 2005

If Paradise Only Had Elevators

Hey guys, I found these here and thought they were awesome!!! Also, check out the link. I confess I actually listen to my girlfriend's CD more than she does. What a friggin' loser! Doesn't the title of this post sound like some kind of emo band's album name?

How to Beat Elevator Boredom

1) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

3) Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if
they know what floor your on.

5) Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Gregg. How's your day been?"

6) Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

8) Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.

9) Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

10) Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

12) Ask, "Did you feel that?"

13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

14) When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

15) Swat at flies that don't exist.

16) Call out, "Group Hug!" and then enforce it.

17) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"

18) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
19) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

20) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

21) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the
other passengers.

22) Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

23) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

24) Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

-Later

2 comments:

Heatherly said...

wow to miracles in a week! sam updated his blog too! shocking! now if only duane did then the world would tilt off its axis and be unable to contain the bloginess of it all!
as for names look at revival chapters like the dry bones. maybe there is a word that will pop out there. since the future life of the church comes from the youth....

Shelynn said...

Hahaha! Duane read these off of your blog one day after school....i of course explained how Kelly and i broke an elevator when we were in San Jose for SYC Tehe! :-P